More Letters from a Nut by Ted L. Nancy

Author:Ted L. Nancy [Nancy, Ted L.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-8041-4980-8
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2013-07-17T00:00:00+00:00

Atina Noslen

PS: I would advise you to keep all important documents in a place other than a refrigerator (they could mold).

Full text of the above letter to follow.

560 No. Moorpark Rd. #236

Thousand Oaks, Ca 91360

Sep 27, 1996

Business Permits

CITY OF LONG BEACH

333 W. Ocean Blvd.

Long Beach, CA 90802

Dear Business Permits Dept.:

I need to get a business permit from you to operate my SUMO VAN in the city of Long Beach. I am moving there soon.

My Sumo Van operates like this: My van stops, the doors slide open, and two 500 pound sumo wrestlers each slap their belly against the other. They grunt and groan and break into a sweat while an audience watches. Everyone loves it!

I charge $5.50 a person. This is good family entertainment. It is something to see, these big wrestlers wearing their tiny sumo lap cloths slapping each other around with their big stomachs. They really go at it. Dogs bark.

Please tell me how I go about getting a permit to operate my Sumo Van on your city streets? I may place 16 vans around your city roaming up and down the streets. At its height, I could have 32 sumo wrestlers belly bumping each other with their girth. Thank you.

Sincerely,

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